198.2
My weight is not moving because I drink! I am stopping during Lent and I really just need to focus on that right now but need really to just stop. I have no self control. I am doing well not eating too much food at once as long as I am not drinking then all control goes out the door.
My hip or a muscle in my butt to be more specific is really bothering me but not as bad as before I started walking like a runway model. lol. I have decided that I am as stiff as a board. I go to Zumba and I am really stiff. I feel like I am really moving then I look in the mirror and I look like a 2x4.
So tomorrow I start my colon cleanse and Wednesday I go in at 6:00 am for my colonoscopy and at 11:00 I have a polyp and external possibly internal hemeroidectomy. It is going to hurt like hell.
So I am down. I got all dressed to go to the gym. I even had my shoes on and I didn't go. Pathetic! I am not having a period but I am still crazy. Who knows what I am going to be like when I stop drinking. God will help me but UG.
OK I just had to get this off my chest.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Feb. 24
198.5 Woooooot Woooooot Hahoooooooy!
Yesterday I ate home made breadsticks and like 1/4 stick of butter. It was yummy. I felt bad. Thanks to all of you who made me feel better. Today I made broccolli with BUTTER olive oil and garlic and a little parmessan. Better than breadsticks and yummy.
My goal weight is 170. I bought a swim suit top yesterday. I bought a large but need an xl.
My "problem" is a little better but I am still going to get surgery. Exercising is a chore right now. I really wish I enjoyed it more.
Yesterday I ate home made breadsticks and like 1/4 stick of butter. It was yummy. I felt bad. Thanks to all of you who made me feel better. Today I made broccolli with BUTTER olive oil and garlic and a little parmessan. Better than breadsticks and yummy.
My goal weight is 170. I bought a swim suit top yesterday. I bought a large but need an xl.
My "problem" is a little better but I am still going to get surgery. Exercising is a chore right now. I really wish I enjoyed it more.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Feb. 15
200.8
I am not eating because it hurts to poop. I went to the doctor (really the PA). He said it was a hemeroid but after looking at it he said it was an external polyp. He lanced it anyway even though he said it wouldn't help. Ya like I want a needle and knife put there when it won't help! Helloooooo. So this was on Friday and he said that they were going to refer me to a surgeon. Well today I called my surgeon (who did my colonoscopy and hemeroid surgery) because I am not waiting in pain anymore. OMG. I am not sleeping or eating much. I can't think about anything but the pain. When I see someone all I want to say is that my butt hurts! This isn't a way to live. I hope I don't have cancer. Not sure I can cope with that. So Thursday at 8:45 I am seeing the surgeon. I hope he can do something that will get rid of the pain right away. I can't stand this much longer.
I am not eating because it hurts to poop. I went to the doctor (really the PA). He said it was a hemeroid but after looking at it he said it was an external polyp. He lanced it anyway even though he said it wouldn't help. Ya like I want a needle and knife put there when it won't help! Helloooooo. So this was on Friday and he said that they were going to refer me to a surgeon. Well today I called my surgeon (who did my colonoscopy and hemeroid surgery) because I am not waiting in pain anymore. OMG. I am not sleeping or eating much. I can't think about anything but the pain. When I see someone all I want to say is that my butt hurts! This isn't a way to live. I hope I don't have cancer. Not sure I can cope with that. So Thursday at 8:45 I am seeing the surgeon. I hope he can do something that will get rid of the pain right away. I can't stand this much longer.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Thursday Feb. 10
202.5
Don't read this if you don't like TMI. Cuz this is definately TMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am soooo damn frustrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My asshole hurts sooooooooooooooooo bad that I think I am going to DIE. I have a hemeroid! A terribly painful hemeroid!. This is my blog where I can write anything so I am writing about my awful awful pain.
I need to find a new Doctor. I think I may have it narrowed down. It is funny listening to everyones opinions because lots of peole love and hate the same docs. I also have my hip/leg problem that is better but not gone and I have to get a colonoscopy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am kind of down today. I hate being in this much pain. I am using ointment. I have tried pushing him back where he belongs. I am ready to cut him out. Not realy. I have already had one hemeroid surgery. UG.
Ok I was doing really well with my roids until this surgery. Fiber doesn' absorb as well and I drink all of that protien so I have been pushing a lot more. I need to go to a doctor. I don't always have such a hard time just when I am between doctors.
OK. I feel better.
Thanks!
Don't read this if you don't like TMI. Cuz this is definately TMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am soooo damn frustrated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My asshole hurts sooooooooooooooooo bad that I think I am going to DIE. I have a hemeroid! A terribly painful hemeroid!. This is my blog where I can write anything so I am writing about my awful awful pain.
I need to find a new Doctor. I think I may have it narrowed down. It is funny listening to everyones opinions because lots of peole love and hate the same docs. I also have my hip/leg problem that is better but not gone and I have to get a colonoscopy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am kind of down today. I hate being in this much pain. I am using ointment. I have tried pushing him back where he belongs. I am ready to cut him out. Not realy. I have already had one hemeroid surgery. UG.
Ok I was doing really well with my roids until this surgery. Fiber doesn' absorb as well and I drink all of that protien so I have been pushing a lot more. I need to go to a doctor. I don't always have such a hard time just when I am between doctors.
OK. I feel better.
Thanks!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Feb. 7 2011
202.9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow! I am down over 90lbs from when I first met with the surgeon for the first time. Today I put on a sweater that my Aunt Pat knitted for me when I was in college! How exciting. Eating is going ok. I could be doing better. I am doing best at not eating too much but I am not doing as well at eating the right things. I try but still get cravings.
PAIN! I have been in pain for so long and I am really affraid to look into it because I don't want a new hip. So I talk a lot about it because I hurt all the time. Well my friend Lori said the word gait (not sur how to spell it) to me one day. Meaning how I walk. That made me think about how I walk a lot sooooo. I mentioned my gait to Nikki one day and she said to walk with my hips. Like heel to toe. Like a runway model. Well you just wouldn't believe what a difference that made. I am not only practising my model walk I am also practising my Hula and belly dancing hip moves. I wasn't using my hip. The pain has gone away by about 50%. The level is the same when it is there but I can't get it to go away quite a bit. That is AMAZING!
Gotta get moving for the day. Talk to ya soon.
Andi
Wow! I am down over 90lbs from when I first met with the surgeon for the first time. Today I put on a sweater that my Aunt Pat knitted for me when I was in college! How exciting. Eating is going ok. I could be doing better. I am doing best at not eating too much but I am not doing as well at eating the right things. I try but still get cravings.
PAIN! I have been in pain for so long and I am really affraid to look into it because I don't want a new hip. So I talk a lot about it because I hurt all the time. Well my friend Lori said the word gait (not sur how to spell it) to me one day. Meaning how I walk. That made me think about how I walk a lot sooooo. I mentioned my gait to Nikki one day and she said to walk with my hips. Like heel to toe. Like a runway model. Well you just wouldn't believe what a difference that made. I am not only practising my model walk I am also practising my Hula and belly dancing hip moves. I wasn't using my hip. The pain has gone away by about 50%. The level is the same when it is there but I can't get it to go away quite a bit. That is AMAZING!
Gotta get moving for the day. Talk to ya soon.
Andi
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Jan. 11 2011
210.9
Congrats to Kyle and Melissa had Caleb Evan Hancock today at 7:14 AM. He weighs 7 lbs. 12 oz and is 20.5 inches.
Now back to me. My friend Nikki has helped me a lot when it comes to making protien drinks easier to make and eat. She also gives me good ideas about things to make and eat. Today I make an opened faced sandwich that I want to share. Get the Costco Bruchetta . It's 60 calories for 1/2 cup. Buy sandwhich thins and foster farms cooked chicken breast strips. All at Costco. I toasted the sandwhich thins and put 3 pieces of chicken across each slice and topped each slice with 1/4 cup of bruchetta. It was delicious. I can only eat one at time so it was 130 calories.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
January 5 2011
212.8
Happy New Year!!! I bought and put on a pair of size 14 jeans. They are not wearable yet but I could zip them up. I made it through Christmas. I exercised a lot and lost a little weight. I am drinking my protien at about 75%. I need to do a better job at taking vitamins. I need to get out more. I am doing more at home but I don't think my kids would agree.
I still have ADD and it's not going away. Behavioral changes are essential. Cravings are still here. I have modified them. Sweets have never been a biggy. Salty fatty things are my weekness and right now I still eat them but I eat less. Eventually my stomach will get bigger and I will be able to eat more and that is bad so I have to get them out of my system. I had my last drink Jan. 1. It was not working well for me. I was getting trashed. If this doesn't work for me I will probably do some type of rehab. It's not really that hard to not drink. The hard thing is that when I drink I can't control it.
Thngs are good. I feel good. I need a job.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!!! I bought and put on a pair of size 14 jeans. They are not wearable yet but I could zip them up. I made it through Christmas. I exercised a lot and lost a little weight. I am drinking my protien at about 75%. I need to do a better job at taking vitamins. I need to get out more. I am doing more at home but I don't think my kids would agree.
I still have ADD and it's not going away. Behavioral changes are essential. Cravings are still here. I have modified them. Sweets have never been a biggy. Salty fatty things are my weekness and right now I still eat them but I eat less. Eventually my stomach will get bigger and I will be able to eat more and that is bad so I have to get them out of my system. I had my last drink Jan. 1. It was not working well for me. I was getting trashed. If this doesn't work for me I will probably do some type of rehab. It's not really that hard to not drink. The hard thing is that when I drink I can't control it.
Thngs are good. I feel good. I need a job.
Happy New Year!
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