276.7

I am DYING tonight! I have not had any solid food since Sunday. I walked 3 miles today. Right now I am eating a pink lemonade sugar free popsicle. I just want to chew. I have only had about 55 grams of protien today. I can have more but I want to lose weight.

Tuesday July 27

278.3

I am so effing hungry right now. I made teriyaki chicken for dinner and I can't eat it. Not even a bite! I need my shake. Today I have had 1 protien shake, 2 cups of green tea my vitamins and lots of water. I will be having another shake. Linda and Megan walked in Banner forest with me today and it was a nice walk. I am going to stick to this but if he doesn't do this I am going to be so mad. I need to go to Costco and get my supplements.

Here is my new motto.

Andi is not a wimp.

Monday July 26

282.7

Today was my nutrition class, pre op with Asshole surgeon and my psych eval. Ok. I usually always go with my gut. If I don't like someone, I usually get away from them. Well, I don't like my surgeon. He is mean and rude. He threatend me today with canceling my surgery because I haven't lost enough weight. They were not talking to me at all before I got approval from the insurance then all of a sudden they call and want to schedule my surgery. No one once asked if I was close to my 30 lbs I as suppose to lose they just said "let's schedule it." Then they schedule my nutrtition class 4 days after my liquid diet was suppose to start and all the informaiton for the liquid diet was in the nutrition class. F to the word!!!!! I am just so mad. I feel like a number and a puppet. But I am told that surgeons don't have a good beside manner and I am told that this surgeon is very good. SO! I am sticking with it but if he cancels my surgery or postpones it then I am going to a new surgeon. I also took the dumbest ever peronality test today. 300+ questions to see if I am crazy or not. UG.

OK sorry that this wasn't a good day. I am tired and hungry. I need to walk a lot so call me anyone. Tomorrow I am just going to walk around Mullenix Ridge. Or maybe I will call Marie!

Andi out!

Oh wait P.S. Mark read through my entire packet and that made me feel good. Thank you honey!

Sunday July 25

283.7


Got as far as the date and remember that it was Elsie's birthday so had to go wish her. Now I have to get ready for my breathing test. More later.

Saturday July 24

283.5

This is damn hard! I don't get why they want me on clear liquids. Monday will tell. I have a nutrition class. I started out today with a protien shake that had one scoop of protien powder, water and banana. Then I juiced using spinach, cucumber, grapes and tomatoes. I have had 2 cups of that so far. I had an avacado. Tomorrow I have my breathing test and ekg. Monday I have the nutrition class, last apt. with Dr. Oh and psych. eval. Can hardly wait till I'm not hungry.

Thursday July 22

283.5

I ate a lot yesterday. It was the day before my liquid diet. I had some tests. Had to fast. Bloodwork, urine, abdominal ultrsound and chest xray. Then I went out to lunch with my family. After that I was wiped out so I took a nap. Then went to get a hair cut. Went to Gayles for dinner and had sushi and ribs! And I drank beer and wine. I don't feel bad.

My PA that I saw on Tuesday said to do the best I can on the liquid diet until my class on Tuesday and tell them that I have been doing the clear liquid all along. I like him. I am using powdered protien powder for now and it isn't a clear liquid. The biggest reason I am doing this is cost. The liquid protien is very expensive and I will have to use it afterward for quite awhile.

I have only had liquids today but I had coffee with half and half and protien powder and for dinner I will be adding yogurt and strawberries.

I am talking to my stomach and telling it that it is not hungry. Smelling everyone elses food is hard. I told Mark no saucage cooking till after the surgery.

I will be trying meditation and doing my hypnosis more.

Andi out!

Monday July 19

284.5

My period started. What a pleasant suprise! NOT. So talking about this is hard for me (not my period ha). I sit at the computer a lot. Like maybe 8+ hours a day. I can do little chores but I tire easily and take lots of breaks. That is getting better since I have been moving more. The hardest thing for me to do is schedule things outside of the house. I can take my kids to practise. They tell me when and where and I go. I hate going to new places. I usually don't go alone. I have to schedule Blaine and Lucas' physicals and I had to reschedule a part of my imaging for my surgery and my office visit with my physician.

The physicals scheduling went fine. I called the number for St. Francis imaging that had been left on my voicemail while on vacation and it was long distance. My imaging is in Gig Harbor. I don't have long distance on my home phone. Using the cell stresses me out because I dont' have good coverage (why did they have to change this I think). I call the number on the paper Dr. Oh's office gave me. It's not long distance. They transferred me, I was transferred again, I got a voicemail. I left a message. I went to the bathroom. The phone rang. I didn't have it. I missed the call. It was St. Joseph hospital. UG They didn't leave a message. What does that mean? Am I suppose to call back or do they? I called the local imaging phone number again and was put on hold. I held for a few minutes and hung up. Called Dr. Oh's office, got voicemail, hung up. Got on my cell called the number back that called me from St. Josephs and explained. Got transferred to scheduling, left a message. She called back to tell me that she doesnt' schedule St. Anthoney's and she transferred me. Guess what? I got another FUCKING voicemail! So I left a message. I hope she calls me back and I have a phone by me. I have so many things to do for my surgery between now and Aug. 5 that I just want to crawl into a hole. I am not good with a busy schedule. Some of my friends thrive on it. I break out in a sweat and want to cry. I am shaking as I type this.

Positives! I made 3 successful appointments today. One for me and one each for Blaine and Lucas. Frutrating! Trying to reschedule this damn diagnostic thing. And my period. Oh my lovely gift from God. BLA!

Between now and Aug. 5 I have to do the following
7/20/10 Dr. clearance from my doctor (she is on maternity leave so I see a PA)
7/21/10 11:00 am tentative Diagnostic imagining ( nothing to eat 8 hours prior.) blood work unine analysis ekg abdominal ultrasound chest x ray pft with Sa 02. I know it sounds worse that it probably is but that is a lot and no one explained to me if this is just one appointment or all. My Dr. isn't easy to get a hold of.
07/22/10 START CLEAR LIQUID DIET! God help the people around me (wait I am having a positive attitude).
7/25/10 SUNDAY 12:15 Breathing test and EKG Don't have to fast so that's ok.
7/26/10 9-Noon Pre surgery education and nutrition class
1 PM Last office visit ( I have only met with the Dr. once)
3-5 Psych eval. HA! What now. I already know that I am crazy!
07/28/10 Pre-op by phone Noon
08/05/10 5:30 AM Check in! Are you kidding me?

I couldn't do this on my own. Gayle is going with me on my busy day. I love you soooo much Gayle!!! Mark should go to the nutrition class but Gayle will understand more and be more of a help to me. I couldn't read the form I just wrote out. Gayle told me what was when then I could look at it. My mind doesn't absorb what I see (as well)until after I hear it.

OK This was good to get off my chest.

Andi out!

Before Pictures

Here are the four views of Andi. Front, side, other side and backside. Ha ha ha. I have to have a sense of humor.

Smile!

Saturday July 17 (Before pictures)

282

Things I am looking forward to!
Touching the ground
No PAIN!
Keeping up with my family
Not sweating so much (have alwyas been sweaty so maybe it won't go away)
Walking without getting out of breath in 10 seconds
No blood preassure meds
Not having to ask people to pick things up for me

Friday July 16

283.4

Went to Costco with Lucas today. Got protien with $3 off for each package. See ya tomorrow.

Thursday July 15

283.9

Yesterday was not a good eating day. Well it was. I ate a lot. I decided to eat my larger meal at mid day and was going to have a protien shake for dinner but we went out and I ate a 450 cal meal which wasn't too bad but then went home and had popcorn. My popcorn is deadly. I need to go to Costco today. They have a liquid protien I want to try. I am really dragging today. Wonder if it is all the salt I've been eating?!

I hate smelling the food that other people cook or I cook for them that I can't eat. I need this surgery because when plan changes I won't be able to mess up as bad because my stomach will only be 2 0z.

Wednesday July 14

283.6

I ate wayyyyyy tooo many almonds yesterday but they left the house so I am good now. I also had a chili cheese and onion omlette and it hurt so I will try to remember the bad feeling.

I have been getting a lot of support from people via email and facebook. I really appreciate it but please feel free to post comments and share as much as you want/can. You would be suprised at how many people struggle. I know I am not the norm and don't mind sharing every little detail of my life but I think people feel better when they know that it's not only them.

OK todays worry! I am very worried about what I am going to do once I lose some of this weight. Right now I spend most of my day on the computer and do very little. I am excited to be able to touch the ground but I am worried about my ADD and being productive. I am alergic to lists but I think I might have to get use to them. I have to get use to these because I think it is the only way I will be able to get things done. You see, most people see lists as a way to feel successful when they get things checked off. I see lists as my obismal failings when I don't get things checked off. I am the queen of half jobs. I know that I have to break my lists down from jobs into tasks. That way I can check off small accomplishes instead of feeling like I never accomplish anything which I do just not big things.

I think I might make a good ADD coach someday. I am good at figuring what is wrong but doing it is a different story so if I can tell someone what to do it will be a lot easier.

I walked 1.9 miles with my pal Brenda yesterday and a shorter walk the day before. Today I and hopefully Blaine will go to Anns to go swimming.

In the great words of Ann

Andi out!

Tuesday July 13

284.4

Happy Birthday Kyle! So I did pretty well yesterday except for a couple of screaming and swearing outbursts. Nathan says I should move to the trailer. Glad he wasn't her for the yelling cuz he might have made me move out. Mark is more forgiving. The other two just role their eyes at me and ignore me.

Thank you Brenda for coming over and walking with me last night. I used my trekking poles and it was really good. I would have fallen 3 times without them.

I can do this. It's amazing the difference of I can do this to - It'll never work makes to your brain. I try to not let that Lilipution in my head. Does anyone know what I am talking about?

I hate feeling hungry. What is it about feeling hungry.

Monday July 12

287.8

So I am right back where I was with my weight when I started this blog. My goal between now and clear liquids is to get as physically and mentaly prepared as possible. I am going with an "I know I can attitude." I had my coffee with my tablespoon of half and half. I think I'm just going to cold turkey the coffee and 1/2 and 1/2 at clear liquid day and go to green tea. For breakfast I had Snoqualimie Falls oatmeal with chopped apple and almonds. I have to get off sugars again because I think it will make it way easier to go to the clear liquids if I am use to not having processed sugar.

7/11/2010

My surgery has been approved and is scheduled for August 5. I have been on vacation for 2 weeks so now I am going to get serious about preparing for this surgery. The paperwork from the doctor says a clear liquid diet for TWO WEEKS. I am going to have to do some serious hypnosis in order to get through this. And not my cds, just Andi telling Andi that she can do this. Please pray for my family and close friends because I can really be a BITCH. It is worth it. I need to shrink my fatty liver in order to have a more successful surgery. My friend who had surgery May 21 is a great motivation for me and I know it will all be worth it. I must have positive self talk! So many things will be better and it's just two weeks of being excruciatingly hungry. Ha Ha. I was looking at a blog of someone who has had this surgery and she loves to cook and she still cooks. My only fear is cooking for my kids who are normal and don't need special meals. Mark wouldn't mind eating what I cook but doing for the boys is going to be hard. We will see. It's more me feeling guilty. OK. So that is my update. I will be better about updating and you better believe that I will be bitching and complaining about how hungry I am. lol